I See

1995, self portrait

Last night I dreamt that I found a horse.

 

Then I realised it was my horse and that it was dying of thirst and starvation as I had neglected it for years.   

I was distraught to think I had done this to such magnificent creature.

I tried to find a bucket to give it water but all I had was a wine glass which I knew was too fragile and small. 

A friend of mine who owns a horse walked by and I decided to ask her for some hay.

***

When I woke up I immediately e-mailed my friend and told her about the dream.  

I also asked if I could buy some hay from her. 

She understood that I was joking but I don't think my unconscious would get the joke.

It would, however, get the message that I am listening to what it is telling me.

You need to take care of the aspect of your life that you are neglecting.

You are in a rut and only a healthy horse can carry you forward.

The Ghosts That Haunt Me

The Ghosts That Haunt Me

oil pastels on paper

approx 17" x 20"

I was looking down at a goat that was strung up by its legs.  

The goat was beautiful. 

It had shiny black fur and the most gentle
Christlike look on its face.

I had cut the skin off its head from the eyes back and I was slicing and eating pieces of its 'meat'. 

Suddenly I saw that the goat was only unconscious.

I realized that I would have to take its heart out and kill it because it would suffer terribly if I put the scalp back on particularly as I had eaten part of it.

It was a horrifying dilemma.

I couldn't kill the goat but I couldn't let it suffer either.


*** 

The black goat represents my unconscious.  

That was easy to figure out - the word 'unconscious' 
was the word I used myself in the dream to describe it.

Peeling back the unconscious (the scalp) and eating 
parts of it (taking in) suggests to me that there are 
some shadow issues I've integrated into my conscious personality.

But the rest of the dream is more problematic.

And "getting to the heart of everything" is going to be a bloody, painful mess.

Hidden

I had a dream this week that I found my nephew 

hiding in a small cave of earth, leaves and wood.  

He was wearing a Sikh head covering.

My nephew is now a grown man with a family but in 

my dream he seemed to be about 12 or 13.

I pay attention to my dreams and this one was 

unusual because the message is so clear.

My unconscious self seems to be  directing me 

to "seek" something that is hidden or lost. 

Anyway, it is always a good idea to let your

unconscious know that you got the message.

Hence the unfinished, untitled picture of a 

mental search.

If I figure out what it is I'll be terribly

tempted to finish the picture

and call it, "Sikh and ye shall find".